Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Men do have one advantage over women -- and it's not what you think.

No, it's not intelligence. Women and men are equally intelligent. Maybe men score better on spatial tests -- hence all the male engineers -- but women trounce men when it comes to any field of study related to emotions and intuition and just being able to get along with other people.
(If women ruled the world, we would all be so much better off!) And it's not muscles, either. Granted, men are, on the whole, stronger than women. So what? We can beat them up, but, thankfully, our modern system of laws makes that a crime. We can run faster -- not me, but the fastest of men -- and lift more weights, but those aren't skills that mean much in the post-school years. In real life, in other words. In my own line of work -- college textbook publishing -- I have seen women hired over men many times, because they were better qualified and better prepared for the job, and I've seen many of them promoted over men for the same reason. No, it's not muscles.

So what is the one big advantage men have over women?

Nothing you've lot of, probably, if you're a woman. If you're a man, you've probably thought of it but also thought: that can't be right, can it? Yes, it can. The one big advantage that men have over women is that we, the men, can pee outside. Almost anywhere.

Think about it. You've been driving for hours, and you have to use the restroom. If you're a woman, you drive and drive until you find a rest stop or a service station or whatever. (And even then, it may be so gross that you can't use it.) If you're a man, you look for the first dark turn-off and you get out and, in a minute or so, you're done and back in the car, feeling no pressure, happy and smiling. Or suppose you're out hiking, and after a few hours you need to go. If you're a woman, you have to find a secluded place and check the ground very carefully for weird insects or whatever, and then, when you're done, you have to wipe yourself with a tissue and find a place to deposit it. The man, on the other hand, whips it out, does his business, zips up, and is gone. No touching anything foreign, no clean-up after.

Fair? Of course not.

But keep in mind, ladies, that, over the course of history, men have been drafted to fight most of the wars and so have died younger and in greater numbers, and that they/we continue to die at earlier ages than you do -- usually because of poor lifestyle choices -- making it possible for you to spend your declining years among other women, your girlfriends, who understand you and appreciate you and love you more completely and sincerely than any man ever did.

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