Get ready for things to go wrong as you get older.

We're all getting older and, as we do, things are going to start going wrong. In our twenties, we're going strong, everything physical and mental all clicking together. In our thirties, it's pretty much the same -- trust me: I've been there. (But if you're a woman, this is when you have to begin thinking about your fertility and whether or not you've found a good man to fertilize your eggs. If you're a man, you probably won't notice much difference.)

In your forties, you may notice some subtle differences: you're starting to gain some weight, get a little softer around the middle (if you're male) or put on some pounds around the hips (if you're female). If you've been exercising regularly, you may not be aware of these changes and may think that you're still the person you were in your twenties and thirties.

Unfortunately, it's not true. Changes are happening inside you, unseen, that will affect you in later years. Your arteries may or may be getting clogged -- depending on your diet -- and any old inherited abnormalities -- diabetes, heart problems, etc. -- may rear their ugly heads. Your forties are the time to start getting those check-ups, okay?

In your fifties, if you read the obituaries, you'll notice that some people your age are dying of cancer and heart ailments. Or "un-disclosed causes", whatever that means. (It's interesting that most obituaries don't list the cause of death, which I'm sure most of us in this age range would love to know: what to avoid, and how?) If you're still exercising, keep it up. Maybe modify your work-outs in recognition of the fact that your muscles aren't going to be growing much more and that your joints may need attention: maybe more treadmill, less jogging on the asphalt roads. More yoga, less weights. Women should be getting the dreaded mammograms, men the equally dreaded prostate exams.

Once you hit your sixites, you're probably still feeling pretty good -- though you don't look quite like that photo of yourself at twenty or thirty -- and, if you're up to it, you should keep doing what you were doing in your fifties. You're still basically the same person, with maybe a few more aches and pains. But make those check-ups once a year now, not just whenever you think of it. Lots of stuff going on internally now that needs to be monitored. Breast cancers for women, prostate cancers for men -- among lots of other hazards too numerous to name.

I'm not qualified to say what men and women should be doing in their seventies to stave off the ravages of old age, as I'm not there yet. I assume it's more of the same: stay as fit as you can and get check-ups and try not to drink or smoke too much. And eat your veggies, right? Right.

If you've lived that long and don't feel too bad, you're probably doing what you should be doing.

A couple of decades ago, a sixty-year old man or woman was OLD. But with modern diets and theories of exercise, etc., those folks are still playing not just golf but tennis! And jogging. And maybe whacking a ball around in a softball league. Bowling for sure. Still active. Both men and women today are years younger than their predecessors, their parents. Lord, their own grandparents -- our great-grandparents -- were ready for the rocking chair by now! Or were dead. Even if we don't keep ourselves as physically fit as we should, we have access to much stronger drugs that help us keep our hearts functioning so much longer. We can all enjoy life all the way to the end.

But you and I know what is coming. Old age. Whether it hits us at seventy or eighty or ninety,
it's on its way, and nothing can stop it. So get ready.

Prepare for it now. Get those check-ups -- your heart, your cholesterol, your whatever -- and do what the doctor says. It's coming. No matter how good you feel, no matter how many miles you put in on your bike or the hiking trails or the dreaded treadmill at the health club: old age is lying in wait for you. As you get older, everything is going to get harder.

But that doesn't mean it all happens at once. You don't wake up at 60 and find that your knees have given out. You don't, all of a sudden, discover that you can't do 20 push-ups or a single pull-up (what we used to call a chin-up). It happens gradually, and all you have to do, to maintain the fitness you now enjoy -- assuming you enjoy some level of fitness -- is adjust your level of activity down instead of up.

You're no longer trying to build muscle mass by adding weights to whatever you're lifting, or miles to whatever you're running. You're trying instead to maintain what you have for as long as you can. If and when you have to reduce the weights you can lift or the miles you can run, then do it. Keep paring it down as you get older.

But don't ever give it up. Don't ever spend a whole day on the sofa watching TV, not doing anything at all for your body. Get out there and do SOMETHING! Walk. Stretch. Bend. Lift some light weights. Walk that horrible treadmill (while listening to something on your Ipod).

Consider, too, how fortunate you are to have gotten to the age you are. I'm a Viet Nam vet, and I saw -- literally -- many young men who never got to see even their 21st birthday. (The same applies to those unfortunate boys and girls in Iraq: such a needless loss.) And the newspapers are sadly full of stories of young people dead in car crashes or from over-doses or, even worse, child abuse. Just be glad that you're still alive, whatever age you are.

And make the most of it! Take up a new hobby or make new friends or start walking/hiking!
For your mind, read a novel or do a crossword puzzle. Discuss that novel with friends or a group. Do that crossword with someone else. And have a glass of wine (or two) in the bargain. Exercise your brain the same way you exercise your body.

I remember, from when I was kid (many years ago), hearing about the artist Grandma Moses, who started painting when she was older than you and I are now. As long as your body and your brain are still intact and working together, you can do anything you want. Don't give up, and don't give in. We have much to teach the young'uns -- whether they want to hear it or not.

Hey, get to know your grandchildren: they may be more receptive to what you have to say than your kids -- and they are the future.

I always loved the quote from a very old guy (nearing 100) who was asked what he most liked about getting old. He said, "I don't have to take any more guff."

That's my motto as I age. "No more guff!" In other words, no more crap! Don't whine to me. Don't lie to me because you think I'm old and won't know anything. Don't condescend to me. Don't act like I don't have a brain. Don't laud your youth over me: I was young once, too, and know that you don't know squat! You have something to say to me? Say it.

I always wanted to have this put on a bumper sticker: "Life is short. Get to the point!"

In other words, as I get older, as I hope I will, I want everyone to either tell me the truth or get out of my way! I'm too old, and too smart, to play games!

Long live us old folks! The elders of the tribe!

Honor us or beware!