You're only as good as what you put on your tombstone -- or your website.

I always heard that the last words the writer Oscar Wilde said were, "Either that wallpaper goes, or I do." If it's not true, I hope it is. Wouldn't you like to be so witty at the end?

I hope that my last words are "I love you" and that anyone present will take it personally.

The problem is that you can't guarantee that you'll even be conscious at the end of your life. Most of us will be drifting in and out, sedated, gasping for breath as our lungs close down and we sink into permanent unonsciousness.

Bye bye.

So what? You can live on through the words you have pay to have engraved on your tombstone. Right?

I know what you're thinking: I'm going to be cremated; I won't have a tombstone.

So how about a website? And why not start one right now, devoted to you and you only?

What do you want your kin to recall about you when you're gone? Don't you want a say in that?
Don't you want to tell your side of the story? Your life story? And don't you want to leave messages to your children/granchildren/et al? Of course you do. And you also want to say some things to others in your life, all those rats who let you down and should know it.

Imagine this: An old acquaintance hears that you died and wants to know how and where and maybe even why. Wouldn't it be good if that person could log onto your website and find out all the pertinent info, and maybe even a personal message to him or her? "And a shout-out to my best friend from high school . . ."

I must admit that I'm new to computers and the internet and don't know how to navigate its intricacies, but I'm smart enough to realize its potential, which is why I encourage you to start a website of your own and to tell your friends/family that you're doing it and where to find it and then write there whatever you want all of them to remember about you when you're gone.

Here's how it works (I think): Contact your internet provider -- AOL, Netscape, whotever -- and say that you want to establish a personal website. It's free and there's probably a link on the home page that directs you. You go to a page and type in all the required info. Then your web page appears online for anyone to read and reply. I'm told you can even put photos on it.

The old-time comedian W.C. Fields is quoted as saying in his epitaph, "On the whole, I'd rather be in Philadelphia". Meaning that he would only choose Philadelphia over death. I always loved imagining the inscription on Peggy Lee's tombstone reading: "Is that all there is?" What a great song, and what a great way to go out!

Pondering my own eventual demise, I've thought of a number of last words: "I'm only surprised it took so long." "What was that?" "As I was saying -- " "The money is under the xdrtpqxcz."

We in America don't like to think of death -- and certainly don't like to think about our own -- but we all know it's coming, so why not plan for it? I don't mean the financial stuff or even the burial details -- I mean the personal part, the YOU that you want remembered in a certain way, the way you knew yourself and wanted others to know you.

It's your last chance to set the record straight before the vultures descend.

You don't vote for the person; you vote for the party.

WARNING: This posting has a liberal slant. If you are a dyed-in-the wool conservative, delete now and spare yourself the bile.

I can't tell you how many times otherwise intelligent friends have said to me, "I don't vote for the party; I vote for the person." At the risk of insulting your intelligence, you're nuts! Ours is a country of two parties -- Republican and Democrat. And they stand for very different views of the way our national government -- Congress, the courts, the President -- should preside and behave. If you're a Democrat, you believe that the national/federal government should provide a basic standard of living -- health care, pension, etc. -- for every citizen, and that we should all be taxed, fairly, to pay for it. If you're a Republican, you believe that the government should protect us against foreign enemies and provide a few needed services -- police and sanitation, etc. -- but that we're mostly left to our own devices to take care of ourselves and our families.

To say that you vote for a man or woman based on his or her personal values is, at best, naive. Each nominee for any office in any town or county or state -- or on the national level -- is running on the platform (i.e., the beliefs) of one party or the other. Only the "independent" candidates truly stand for what they believe, and they never win the big elections.

You may have thought that Ronald Reagan was a wonderful man, but when he got into office as President, he cut subsidies to poor people with a vengeance. Why? Because, despite his charm, he was a Republican, and Republicans believe in eliminating as many government-sponsored programs as they can. To them, it's all about self-reliance. And, to give them credit, that's one of the founding principles of our nation.

The problem is that lots of people have a really hard time in life, often but not always their own fault. We humans are weak and fallible and susceptible to all kinds of temptations. We want to feel better, so we drink or do drugs. That doesn't always make us criminals. One political party thinks it does.

While you're thinking about that, think about this: What if you had been born into a family of drug-addicts and pimps. Don't you think the government should pay you some special attention? Offer you a boost out of all that? Try to save you from insanity and/or crime?

Democrats do. And anyone who runs as a Democrat shares that value. And is willing to pay a little more in taxes to make it happen, to at least try to save that child.

Republicans would likely say that it was the duty of the addicted parents to save that child. If they reneged on their obligation, so be it. God's will.

Admit it. You could as easily have been born into that kind of family as the one who showered you with love and everything you desired. Or the one you actually were born into.

Being on your own -- self-reliant -- isn't always as easy as it sounds.

I think that our national government should guarantee -- on however low/basic a level -- each citizen the wherewithall to make it on his or her own. The last thing we want in this wonderful country of ours is a permanent lower-class with no hope and nothing but hatred in their hearts.
Our rising tide should indeed lift all boats. (Lest we all sink together.)

How we accomplish this is where the dialogue lies. Rebublicans are not bad people, anymore than Democrats are. We both have our rascals, and while we both vilify each other -- sometimes personally, sometimes viciously -- we're still on the same page in wanting to live in a country where we all, whatever our opinions, put up with each other.